Well Merry Christmas everyone. I hope you all take a second to think about what is really important, I know kids won’t but it is there day so they do not have to. That will conclude the moral fiber portion of this blog post.

Today my son said “He always gets the best game system for Christmas” I love you daddy. That is when shit just hits like a ton of bricks. What happens now in the future if I can’t provide the best stuff for him. I mean video game systems do not matter at all but they mean everything to him. He doesn’t know anything is wrong yet. Until we know if the prognosis is decent we aren’t telling him.

This gives me yet another reason to fight though with all the waiting to find out how bad the situation actually is, whether there is a fight a not I am choosing to assume there is a fight coming. To keep the people I love safe I will wage a WAR against this disease. Today I quit smoking, it has nothing to do with my kind of cancer but its overall an inhibitor of my chances so it has to go. No more excuses. I have said this before but the stakes are higher now. Doesn’t mean there might not be stumbles but I have to do it.

Good luck me choosing the most stressful period of my life before I even know if there is much of a reason to quit. Goals however are goals.


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